Breast Cancer

Hostage

i wanted to run away-
trapped by a body
that no longer felt safe.
it was inside of me.
there was no way to escape.

Shoo Cancer, Don’t Bother Me

Death tally: one mother, one father, one marriage, one brother, another brother—nearly. For 45 years I thought of myself as a survivor, but when you don’t have any visible scars to show for it, nobody really acknowledges your wounds.

Survivorship Is a Journey All on Its Own

Sharing my breast cancer journey has become very important to me and my grief process. I have found profound healing in the power of sharing my experiences and raw feelings with the world. The most important thing I like to talk about is survivorship, and this is the story of my walk to survivorship.

Finding Solace in Survivorship

She protected me,
The day’s events could’ve rocked my world,
Could’ve broken me down beyond repair,
But she protected me.

Dating and Relationships During Cancer

Hi Herd,

It’s been a while. I missed you all. I took a long break from the big “C” word and decided to live a “normal life.” Did you all think that I got very far? LOL!

Cancer Friends

Friends.

Cancer during COVID. Seven hours from family. Neutropenic in the middle of a global pandemic. An unexpected passenger on the roller coaster of life.

Silver Linings

When you think of your life and how it’s supposed to go, cancer never enters the picture. But when it does, everything stops, at least temporarily. While you try to wrap your mind around the thought that this disease just might kill you.

My First Day of Forever

After weeks of anxiously waiting, it was finally here, my first day.

Not my first day of school.
Not my first day at a new job.
Not my first day moving into a new house.
This was my first day of chemotherapy.

I Wish I Knew

I wish I knew how scared other people would be, as if they could catch death just by being near me.
I wish I knew how many people would slowly fade away from me.
I wish I knew how incredibly hard it is to tell people how scared you are.

Scars and Souvenirs

“Your MRI result came back and it looks beautiful. We won’t know for sure until after surgery, but it appears you had a complete response to the chemotherapy.” As I heard my oncologist say these words, I could feel my heart start to beat a little faster, almost as if perking up at the idea of truly living again. Sure, I still had a lumpectomy, 20 rounds of radiation, and the rest of my immunotherapy to endure. But the cancer was gone and the worst part was over. I could breathe a sigh of relief as my life was finally mine again. Right?