Survivorship

Chemo Bath

I’ve never been the biggest fan of baths. Ever since cancer attacked my body, showers have also been annoying. Probably the daily ear infection due to my extra ear hairs (thanks Panitumumab).

The Waiting Room

I sit here in the hospital waiting room, pondering platitudes, since I have nothing better to do. Perhaps the best way to become friends with time is to decide it doesn’t exist.

My Own Worst Enemy

Dear Cancer,

I’ll never forget the day we met. We were introduced haphazardly by the radiologist who read my CT scan results, just minutes after I left my appointment.

What the Fire Left Behind

You arrived like smoke under the door.

At first, I didn’t notice.

Just the soft shift in light,

the sudden weight in my chest.

Survivorship Songs

I do not know about you, but music has helped me through some of the best and worst parts of my life. Take cancer, for example. When asked what my fight or survivor song is, I say, “Sorry Not Sorry” by Demi Lovato.

Dear Cancer, You Were Never the Ending

You didn’t just show up—you broke in.
You didn’t knock; you kicked the door in, tossed your shoes on my clean floor, and made yourself comfortable in places you were never invited.

Dear Cancer, You Will Constantly Lose

Dear Cancer,

I never would have thought that I would be given an opportunity to send a letter to you and tell you how much you have meant in my life.

We Are More Than Our Diagnoses

Dear Cancer,

You might think you’re strong.

You’ve shown up like a thief in the night, uninvited and unapologetic.

Mutant Reasons

Genetic mutation is something that just happens, it’s random and inevitable. Lots of times when a gene mutates, it doesn’t even matter.

The Unspoken Guilt of Living

Twice.

I’ve survived cancer twice.

It’s a statement that still feels unreal—unreal and grotesque.