The Elephant in the Room is Cancer. Tea is the Relief Conversation Provides.

Dear Cancer: The Chaotic Voyage

by Rachel BeckerSurvivor, Breast CancerJune 17, 2024View more posts from Rachel Becker

Dear cancer,

You made life messy. I expected it to be clean, linear, and perfect. But it’s none of these. Rarely does life sail along without at least a few waves crashing into my fragile vessel. Why do I expect perfection from a world that’s flawed? Perhaps it’s the thin desire for calm waters that shimmers like a mirage in the distance. Or maybe I actually don’t want calm but instead, thrive in the chaos. Messiness allows my soul to rebuild and evolve into a new imperfect spirit. Perfection shines like a beacon in the night, showing the exquisite messiness that surrounds me. Lighthouses guide me in the perfect disorder that is my world and occasionally give hope amidst the madness. A call from a friend, soft kitty fur, and a sunny day. These are the things that nourish the determination needed to navigate the mess. Warm coffee, bird songs, and chirping crickets. Special smooth stones amongst the wet and craggy rocks. The universe feeds me love amongst the jumble of shit. Life is messy and fucked and beautiful.


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