Cancer

Dating and Sex After Cancer

It was always going to be hard—deciding when to start dating after cancer. I waited until I had my NED (no evidence of disease) results and then made a conscious effort to start talking to people on Bumble, as if I was a “normal” 34-year-old in the dating pool. I’m sure I speak for an entire generation when I say I hate Bumble.

Time Cannot Stand Still

Have you ever stopped to notice the way time stands still when a fire truck or an ambulance passes by? Cars in the intersection and pedestrians in the road all freeze. I know that it is required by law, but at the same time, it is a beautiful thing, a display of the good that humanity can be.

Can You Hear Me? Do You See Me?

I will not leave my bed this morning. Unshowered and in my PJs, I lay. My body is too heavy—laden with pain and sorrow. These later years are so different in my cancer journey than my earlier years. My cancer stayed, but in 15 years, the support has faded.

Survivorship Is a Journey All on Its Own

Sharing my breast cancer journey has become very important to me and my grief process. I have found profound healing in the power of sharing my experiences and raw feelings with the world. The most important thing I like to talk about is survivorship, and this is the story of my walk to survivorship.

Finding Solace in Survivorship

She protected me,
The day’s events could’ve rocked my world,
Could’ve broken me down beyond repair,
But she protected me.

Blossoming Through Adversity

My mother named me after a flower, with the intention and the idea that I am capable of growing and blooming. When I was diagnosed with osteosarcoma as an eight-year-old child, I learned the ability to grow. At first, I was confused by the word cancer.

Dating and Relationships During Cancer

Hi Herd,

It’s been a while. I missed you all. I took a long break from the big “C” word and decided to live a “normal life.” Did you all think that I got very far? LOL!

Dear Matt

Dear Matt,

If you are reading this, it means that I am not going to die anytime soon. Sorry.

Exploring Death Anxiety in Cancer Survivorship

April 27th, 2020 is the day I will remember forever, as it is the day that I died. Looking back, I can only see my own naivety. The wide-eyed, hopeful version of myself. I never saw her again after that and I never will, but I can still see glimpses of her in the mirror.

The Roller Coaster Ride

I remember sitting on my very first roller coaster ride in West Edmonton Mall back in 2008. I was 11 years old at the time and I was peer pressured to go on the ride. I knew I wouldn’t enjoy it but I got on it anyway. Once the ride started, my hands started turning white from gripping the handlebars too tightly and I was screaming so loudly, as if my life was about to end.