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Into the Void: A Poem of Survivor Grief

by Carly FlumerAugust 24, 2020View more posts from Carly Flumer

Into the Void: A Poem of Survivor Grief

A blanket of grief enrobes me as I talk with other AYA cancer patients.

As I hear their stories, painful thoughts crash in waves and quickly make their way to the forefront of my mind, creating emotional turmoil. 

“Why them and not me?” I think, as I want to pull the blanket down and hide my eyes, too embarrassed to show their tear-filled ducts.

I hear one of my doctor’s voices echo in the background. “I wouldn’t worry; if you had to get cancer, this would be the one to get.”

I think about how lucky I am, the positive statistical trends of thyroid cancer scrolling through my brain like flash cards.

“Know what your life is worth,” a woman with 3 years left to live says to us. I fear my empathy will never be enough.

All of the posts written for Elephants and Tea are contributed by patients, survivors, caregivers and loved ones dealing with cancer.  If you have a story or experience you would like to share with the cancer community we would love to hear from you!  Please submit your idea at

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